Winter is upon us, dogs scattered around the house, along with lego and blankets.  More time is spent inside, playing lego or games.  I signed Jack up for swimming lessons, I remembered, but they don't start until next month.  I also signed myself up for pottery lessons in the new year.  I tried to find a photography class but came up empty handed which was weird.  I did join an Edmonton photography group on Facebook and I'll see how that goes.  

I'm still having a hard time being retired, not sure who I am anymore if I'm not a nurse.  I also find that the days just slip away with laundry, housework, and cooking.  I thought I would have more time for myself but unless I carve some time out for myself, I don't thinks that's going to happen, hence, the pottery class.  It is a commitment to myself.  

I worked yesterday and hugged three patients, with their permission.  One patient had been given two years to live, nine years ago.  I remember her and I'm so glad that she's still on the right side of the grass.  She managed to get divorced, has a new relationsip, and she's happy.  Another young woman with a two year old and an eleven month old, was just diagnosed with uterine cancer.  If I had recieved that news, I would have been a puddle. There was a third patient but I can't for the life of me remember who it was.  It was a busy day yesterday, but nothing bad happened.  As always, I was exhausted after the eight hours.  I think in the new year, I will cut back the shifts I'll take to four or six hours, and fewer shifts.  I need to start the next chapter of my life, figure out who I am when I'm not nursing.  

Steve from London was the inspiration for the orchid below.  He rescues plants and has lovely orchids.  I've never been able to get an orchid to grow or flower.  I also like to see a flower or two in the winter, so I took myself to the nursery a couple of months ago to try to buy an orchid.  They're so expensive, and as I told the lady who was helping me, I also have a cat that may, or may not, destroy the plant.  She pointed me towards the half price table and I picked out this one.  It had no flowers on it, just a stem, but I thought, what the hell.  And then it started to grow and put out buds.   It makes me happy.

 

Miss Katie is still not doing well with the new antipsychotic she's on, very restless and agitated.  The bladder infection seems to have resolved though, so that's good.

I still need to walk the dogs, but I'm waiting for it to warm up a little and the sun has come up, which is much nicer.  Sunrise was 8:43am this morning and not much longer to the solstice.  The days will get longer soon, with a respite from the dark.  I'm off to lunch with a friend today, because I need to cultivate friendships away from work.  Nothing grows without time and attention.