Marsh marigold.
I had a mammogram a few weeks ago and they saw something different on it, something that had not been on previous images, so the radiologist suggested I have an ultrasound to investigate. I had the ultrasound the other day at work, they had a cancellation and could fit me in, and it turns out, it's just a cyst. Of course I never thought it was cancer (I can hear laughing in my head, of course I was convinced it was cancer) and I'm so thankful it's just a cyst. Colour me happy.
One of the nurses in our building, a nurse in chemo, has been diagnosed with stage four pancreatic cancer. She's only forty-six years old and she's one of us, that's breaking my heart. I make sure I put up funnies on instagram for her, because I think laughter is the best medicine.
I still miss Lucy and I think Heidi is missing her as well. I've been taking Heidi for extra walks and she's been getting extra love. This morning I filled in an application for a new dog. We'll see what happens. It's a male dog, which I haven't had in a long time, not sure how he and Heidi would get along. Heidi is not very keen on males sniffing her back end. I think she's had enough of males, lots of litters, and would prefer they just leave her alone.
My young neighbor has just blown up her life. She has three kids, two autistic, home schools, wants to live in Mexico, and also has bipolar disorder. She and the kids spent four and a half months living in Mexico last winter and she decided she wants to do that every year. Long story but they're trying to sell their house, it's a fucking mess ( I do love her but she is a terrible house keeper) and everything has just blown up. Now she wants a divorce, or not, figures her husband will still support them all and can't stand to be around him. He's a nurse who has PTSD from Afghanistan (he was in the military before becoming a nurse) and works long hours to support them all. Sigh. Life is not easy for any of us.
We're also in the middle of an election here in Alberta. Our premier is a nutbar, so that's always fun.
I've been planning my funeral, because you never know when you'll kick it.
Massive relief, I can imagine, after the ultrasound. Every time we bury someone, I write down my funeral plans, especially the music list. I am down to one song, Imagine by John Lennon and how I wish I could be around to see my sisters-in law's reaction to "there's no heaven" and "no hell below us" and "above us only sky" but that's mean, so I am thinking to say that I don't care. My husband is thinking of "Return to sender" as his funeral song though. Our daughter warned us that she'll come up with her own plans.
ReplyDeleteHey, pick the song you want. Who cares? A friend of mine had us all sing, "Always Look On The Bright Side Of Life" from Monty Python. It was beautiful and funny and uplifting.
DeleteI would have been terrified. I'm so happy that it's just a cyst. But ugh, the worry until it's verified by a test. We always had male (fixed) dogs and female cats. No reason for it though. I don't understand how people think, even some of them close to me. (younger daughter for example)
ReplyDeleteI don't understand how I think sometimes, other people usually baffle me.
DeleteHah! I like the bag of popcorn idea. Your funeral song is a good one, as is your husband's. I hate it when the mammogram place wants you to come back, I've had that once and it is nerve wracking.
ReplyDeleteCan you imagine? Popcorn! It would sure liven up the crematorium:)
DeleteI am SO glad it's only a cyst. Jesus! It's so scary when they "see" something. I always wonder why, if the ultrasound is what they used to make a determination, why don't they just use that to begin with? I'm sure there's a reason and you probably know it.
ReplyDeleteIf you get a new dog, I hope it's one everyone can get along with. I don't blame Heidi for her lack of interest in males.
Your neighbor sounds exactly like the sort of person I used to get all wrapped up with, trying to help and trying to be the voice of reason with and so on and so forth. Not any more. And hey! Who knows? Mexico just might be a better place for her and her children.
A mammograms take less time. If they see something suspicious on a mammo, then they go to ultrasound. It took the tech about fifteen minutes to find one cyst, based on the rads assessment of where it was. You just couldn't screen many women with ultrasounds.
DeleteShe's young and slightly manic right now. I feel for her and for her husband.
I have to get the big laugh out first! Now I so want to eat that unpeopled corn.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry about your fellow nurse. It's crap. Let's hope your neighbors mania blows over, this sounds like a big mess.
Can Heidi meet the dog before the adoption?
Big smile with the meme.
ReplyDeleteThe downside of working in the area you do is that we know too much and always imagine the worse. I hope your neighbour sorts her stuff out but DO NOT GET INVOLVED!!
ReplyDeleteGlad it was just a cyst. Good luck with the new dog!
ReplyDeleteOh my word, what a roller-coaster of a post, although I'm really glad your mammo came back ok!
ReplyDeleteWell, that's good news about your cyst, but how horrible for your co-worker. I hope your neighbor figures out how to make changes happen without upending everyone's lives too much. As my grandmother would say, "People do have a time!"
ReplyDeleteI'm sure I would be beside myself with worry. You make light of what must have been a difficult time. Take care and love your new dog; they are the best of medicine.
ReplyDeleteGood about the ultrasound!
ReplyDeleteYour poor neighbor sounds like she wants to get away from something, if she could only figure out what it was....sadly it might be herself.
I am pleased to hear that the alarm bells over your mammogram were not justified. As for your young neighbour and her dreams - what a crazy life she envisages! Has she thought for a moment about the education of her children?
ReplyDeleteWell that's a relief (as I well know, having been through my own mini-ordeal lately). I hope you did something to celebrate. Darn boobs anyway.
ReplyDeleteSorry to hear about your co-worker. Fuck, life is painful sometimes.
-Kate
I am glad you did not find anything more serious than a cyst, but I know your heart breaks for your fellow nurse and friend. Your young neighbor sounds either very brave or very foolish, maybe both. I hope she finds what she is looking for, and that the kids dont suffer in the process.
ReplyDelete