We've had a lot of snow and cold weather but this week it warmed up and today it's raining.  You can imagine what that does to the roads.  This morning on the way into the city, there were eight cars and trucks in the ditch.  I stayed in the city to get my booster shot and then drove home; the roads much improved but still a school bus and a SUV added to the mess in the ditches.  

I took a vacation day today and now I have a four day weekend which is just lovely and seems to stretch endlessly in front of me.  I'm feeling better than I was the other day.  Writing and remembering the bad stuff that's happened over the past three years knocked me down.  

Then yesterday my son started phoning me.  He called ten times and left a lot of messages.  He's back in jail, maybe, I'm not really sure.  There was another incident with his wife, the police were called and he was taken into custody, again.  The rambling messages he left me seemed like confabulation, "Confabulation is the creation of false memories in the absence of intentions of deception. Individuals who confabulate have no recognition that the information being relayed to others is fabricated."

 

He wove together a story that invovled some truths, some lies and probably some things that have stuck in his brain for a long time.  He talked about dirty cops, evidence being planted, his other son needing a brain shunt, pediatric hospitals, abuse, teeth and dentists.  I listened to all of the messages and made notes.  His wife is going to move now and hopefully, won't let him back in, again.

I think years of drug use have fried his brain and I grieve for my son but I will not let him back into my life.  

Last night Gracie came over to see Jack after we got home.  A friend brought her and when I asked the friend if she was vaccinated, she said no and I asked her to please leave.  She then grabbed Jack, kissed him all over his face and then argued with my husband before leaving.  That was not pleasant but when Gracie was alone, she was good.  

She looks better than I've ever seen her.  I've only ever know Gracie pregnant or drunk or high.  She's sober and makes sense.  She's been doing a lot of work on herself  and she understands that she has a lot more work to do.  Best of all, she paid attention to Jack and it was wonderful to see.  He was happy to see her and to be seen by her, and she was happy to see him.  Gracie talked a lot and I listened.  I have hope, I always hope.  I guess only time will tell what happens.

The rest of Gracie's family comes home from Mexico on Saturday, so I guess we'll see what kind of a shit show that is.  But right now, today, Jack knows his mama loves him and she showed him that she loves him.  And how wonderful is that.