Monday, August 2, 2021


We had Jack for four nights last week.  After his mama picked him up yesterday, I missed him.  The house feels empty.  It's nice to have the house to ourselves again but I miss him too.  He's funny.  If I squeeze his nose and say beep, beep, he will say honk, honk.  If squeeze his nose and say honk, honk, he will say beep, beep.  On Friday night he played on the front lawn where I had set up the sprinkler to water my flowers.  He wanted to be naked but I explained the diaper had to stay on in the front yard.  And then an amulance drove by which made his night.  Yesterday he was tired and ended up riding in Katie's wheelchair for a bit which amused both of them.  Katie is starting to get used to him coming with us on our outings.  She prefers to be the center of attention but she's coping.

We drove down to Westaskiwin today after my mother in law called.  Apparently yesterday my father in law had a bad fall.  He knocked himself unconscious, ended up in emergency, and needed stitches and bandages.  He's on a blood thinner for atrial fib so I imagine there was a lot of blood involved.  Then last night he took another funny turn while sitting on the edge of his bed so the paramedics were called again but he declined to go to the hospital.

He looked beat up when we arrived but not as bad as I thought he would be.  He was chatty and making jokes.  He's eighty-seven and I imagine he is coming close to the end of his life.  The last year of life, no matter your age, seems to follow the same path, a downward spiral that becomes more and more impossible to recover from.  He's diabetic.  He's falling.  He's got atrial fib and left branch bundle block.  He's on blood thinners which is just a whole other thing that is bad and often necessary for elderly people.  He's got prostrate problems and incontinence now.

I like my father in law.  He says what he thinks.  I don't always agree with him but he's not stupid and he's pretty easy going.  He also has a very good sense of humor.

My mother in law was having a hard time today.  She's bossy at the best of times and last night she thought her husband of sixty-one years had died, twice, in one day.  She wants to control everything (why does that sound so familiar?) but she can't.  It's hard watching someone you love, someone you've spent pretty much your entire life with, decline.  


5 comments:

  1. The first years of life and the last years of life and so much in between. Sweet to hear about Jack's growing sense of humor and playfulness and that your father in law has a good sense of humor. I see you as having a healthy balance of levity and gravity in your full life. Sending love, especially, to your mother in law who is fortunate to have her son and you to help them when things get rough.

    As always, you see the beauty. Love the daisy with its intricate golden mandala!

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  2. I'm sorry about your father-in-law. Hell, I'm sorry for the whole human race when it comes to the end of our years. Lucky and few are those that just keel over, transitioning in an instant.
    Well! I'm cheerful this morning. I'll think about Jack and his beeps and honks. That will help.

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  3. So sorry to hear about your father-in-law's struggles. You're right -- it seems some people get into a sort of downward spiral, and sometimes it happens fast and sometimes it's slow. He may pull out of it, though. Hard to tell! As for Jack, oh for the days when an ambulance sighting was something to celebrate!

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  4. Aging is so hard. Never pretty. I remember this stage in the lives of my elders, all the aunts and uncles, now gone. The man and I are the elders now, though we still feel 25 and are often jarred when we catch ourselves in mirrors. I hope things get gentler for your in laws.

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  5. You got it all there, the baby growing up and the old man approaching his end. I wish both of these could be good experiences.

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