I worked yesterday and it was busy, even with seven nurses on the floor (normal is four). As always, I love interacting with my patients, they truly are amazing people.
I recognized one of the names on the list of patients yesterday. It's not a common name and I wondered if I knew him. When I called his name and he stood up, I said, "I know you.", he looked so much like his father. He looked surprised but when I explained that Brenda (his sister) and I were best friends when we were teens, he vaguely remembered. He was older than me and Brenda, by nine years so he wasn't home much, and was married probably a year after Brenda and I became friends. Brenda had three older brothers and what I remember most is that when they had supper, those boys had a plate of potatoes and veg, and then another plate with meat. They also had the tiniest house, a two bedroom house with six kids. They had built three bedrooms in the basement and always had a boarder as well. After the two oldest boys married, Brenda's parents built an addition on the house, a kitchen, which I'm guessing her mom must have loved.
We chatted and caught up and I told him what wonderful people his parents were; they were always kind to me and always welcomed me. Their house was always a safe place when I was a teen. I could breathe there, and have fun there. He even took a photo of me and him and sent it to his sister. It's a small world.
Not much else going on. I was talking to my neighbor across the street, whose children go to Jack's school. My neighbor's oldest has ADHD and autism and she was telling me about something called heavy work. I had never heard the term, so I looked it up. Basically, it's about proprioceptive input, which helps calm and organize the brain, and helps calm the body down as well. Proprioception is the sense that lets us perceive the location and movements of our body parts. When I looked at the some of the activities, I realized that many of them are already activities that Jack does, on his own. Perhaps he realizes that he feels better afterwards.
This morning while Jack was supposed to be getting dressed for school, he was walking around and around my kitchen island, talking and talking, while I did the dishes. Oh, and he was buck naked. I leave him when he's like this, he's trying to discharge what probably feels like too much energy. I also got him to do some pushups. He wants "abs" and wanted to know if pushups would give him abs. I assured him they would. Eventually he got dressed and I took him to school.
I lifted weights for years, from my twenties to my forties, completely unaware that it was probably helping to calm my body and my mind. I've always walked and found that so helpful for calming my mind. I continue to carry heavy things, despite my age, and now I know why. It helps. Turns out I'm not to old to learn knew things:)
I think humans in general are built to do heavy work and few of us do. That may explain a lot.
ReplyDeleteI know I sleep much better and just generally feel better when I have been active, and working hard, preferably outside.
DeleteI've never heard the term "heavy work," but it makes sense that getting out of our heads and inhabiting our physical bodies (and getting exercise) is calming. It's funny that Jack is thinking about "abs" -- how old is he? Five?
ReplyDeleteHe plays video games and one of them involves a gym and making your muscles bigger. And yes, he's five.
DeleteI've never heard of proprioceptive input and its effects either, so thanks for educating me this morning!
ReplyDeleteYou're welcome. I learned a little bit about it with Katie but that was a long time ago and it looks like it's even better understood now.
DeleteWhat a lovely exchange you had with your patient, good memories dredged up. And that heavy work concept is fascinating. Now I know why the only sort of exercise I enjoy in a gym is lifting weights. It feels so satisfying.
ReplyDeleteAll that movement is probably why kids are happier too.
DeleteI like to lift weights. They're not as heavy as they used to be, but it's still soothing. It's interesting that Jack has figured out that heavy work makes him feel better.
ReplyDeleteI was reading over some of the activities and he already does some of them like pushups, carrying heavy stuff, chores, and tight, squishy hugs.
DeleteThat was a great connection you made with your patient. It is indeed a small world. I know when I do things physical, it helps calm me in so many ways.
ReplyDeleteI went to that guy's wedding. I was only twelve but I remember it well.
DeleteHeavy Loads was very interesting. Is it that the brain in focused on one difficult task and not skating about willy nilly?
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure but it makes sense.
DeleteThank you for this post!
ReplyDeleteYou're welcome. And thank you to you for reminding me to look on the bright side.
DeleteIt is certainly a small world! Great that you could revisit those excellent memories. Heavy work makes a lot of sense; using our bodies distracts and calms our minds and releases energy. My older grandsons do many of these things and I should do MORE!
ReplyDeleteOur bodies were made to be used but they get less use now than they did even fifty years ago.
DeleteHeavy work makes absolute sense to me - maybe you instinctively knew this all these years. And can you imagine having four kids in a two-bedroomed home? You'd make it work, of course, but ....!
ReplyDeleteThey had six kids! And no I couldn't imagine.
DeleteThat's a great list. My kid loved heavy work in the garden, she would put stones in her pockets to show me how strong she was. I think kids need that, gettinga sense of their body.
ReplyDeleteStones in the pockets is a good idea, Jack certainly loves rocks.
DeleteI always felt better after ballet class. Another thing in a different vein that I do is handwash dishes for the two of us. I no longer use my dishwasher as I would run out of forks and spoons before it was full. It is soothing to me to do them myself and satisfying to clean off my counter. My nieces love cleaning their houses - I don't.
ReplyDeleteI end up hand washing stuff too, otherwise I would run out of knives and forks. I also started using my good silverware as everyday utensils and they can't go in the dishwasher. I clean counter is a wonderful thing.
DeleteHow wonderful to see you long time ago friend's brother. Maybe you and your friend will reconnect? I am smiling about Jack wanting abs. This is simply precious.
ReplyDeleteMy friend and I did reconnect a couple of years ago. She lives two provinces away and our lives went in very different directions. She was and still is religious, which works for her, and me, not so much.
DeleteNever too old to learn. Case in point: you just taught me something very useful.
ReplyDeleteSorry I haven't visited for a while; I admire your strength and resilience and your service to others and the way you write about it so authentically. Your voice helps others and has helped me.
I'm glad I was able to teach you something and thank you.
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