I'm reading "All The Light We Cannot See", and I'm crying, reading about World War Two and all the terrible, horrible things that happened,. And I realize that our world right now is not so different from Europe in the 1930's and I get scared and sad.
And I wonder why we humans, as a species, have learned nothing from the past, and keep repeating the same horrible actions, the hatred, the killing, the blind eye.
Why can't we practice compassion and kindness? Why can't we see that "other" people are no different than us? Why do we believe there is an other? There is only us, only we. And when we hurt another, we hurt ourselves and the whole world suffers.
A doc I used to work with killed herself. She was only 46. The world too much for her.
Jack struggles with the anger of others, fearful, remorseful, afraid that he will no longer be loved and I want to hit Gracie and understand that I am no different than anyone else who can hurt other people.
And I'm so tired. Tired of rhetoric, tired of hatred, tired of bullshit.
It's been a tough week, so many new patients, so much pain and suffering. People hoping for miracles where none exist.
I know this will pass but right now, it's painful.
I find that crying helps.
ReplyDeleteA great many of us have the same thoughts - you just said it out loud. There is no "other" - you are right it is all "us". My only salvation is looking back in history to see this is how humans are although I keep having hope that we can change.
ReplyDeleteYou know that old quotation "War is hell" -- what an understatement.
ReplyDeleteI realize I'm about to say something facile - but do you think it's something in the psyche of men? Men do this. Men planned and executed this atrocity in Gaza, on both sides. Sitting here in my relatively safe country (for the moment) the terror and heart break of so much of the world is unfathomable.
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like Jack is setting boundaries for himself. Good.
It is painful and frightening to see the same patterns repeating; we don't learn from the past because we don't take away the same messages from it if we even study it. Too many see Hitler as powerful and dominating and they want that same power for themselves. The obsessions with religion, land, power and ego(male mostly) are the cause of many (most?) of our conflicts. I think that we are all different and that the key is accepting and respecting those differences. Diversity and acceptance seem to be "dirty" words to the right wingers these days. I've read that book and although it's well-written, it was too disjointed for me, and the stories didn't tie together until nearly the end. However, I'm in the minority with my negative review!
ReplyDeleteI gave up on the book too as I agree, it didn't flow for me. I might try to continue it at sometime but I won't hold my breath!
DeleteThere is no mystery as to why you feel this way. There IS so much pain and there seems to be so little hope that anything will ever change. All we can do, most of us, is tend to what is right around us and do our best there. Hugging you.
ReplyDeleteThe worse the world gets, the less I want to leave my house.
ReplyDeleteIf women ran the world , things universally would be kinder deArheart x
ReplyDeleteMy mother always said that!
DeleteYou may be no different from anyone else who CAN hurt other people, but you are indeed different from anyone else who DOES hurt other people. Actions are different from potential.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry it's a bad week. Humans just can't let go of our instinctive tribal nature, which probably helped us when we lived in small bands in primitive societies, but unfortunately hurts us on the global stage!
ReplyDeleteIn your line of work there's a lot of human emotion to process. At times it must seem like a weight pressing down upon you. It's good that you can release some of that pressure here - by sharing with your adoring public.
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