An old photo taken in Jasper National Park, near the Moberly homestead.
Last week Gracie started up again. She started texting me by saying that it was time Jack came home with her. She had a job (for eight days), she had an apartment, (for three days), and she was sober, (for three weeks). When I said no, we were waiting for her mom to come home and the guardians were going to have a meeting to talk about what was best for Jack, she became abusive. She was going to call the police (that was repeated a lot). She accused me of kidnapping Jack (again, lots of repetition on that one), told me what a terrible mother I was (that's why my son was such an asshole) and then she said I had looked at her medical records (I did not and would not). She told me she would make sure I lost my nursing license which upset me the most I think, that and the police. I tried to be reasonalbe with her but that didn't work at all. It went on for awhile and I finally blocked her.
Needless to say it upset me a lot. Kate from Stubblejumpers Cafe talked me off the ledge, thank you so much, and I talked to a friend nearby. When I'm being attacked like that, it feels like a physical assault. My son used to do the same thing which is why we no longer have contact. I am one of those people who often feels like they are at fault and have done something wrong, even if I haven't.
I let her mom and sister know what was going on, two of Jack's guardians. Yesterday Jack went to visit his aunt and uncles, to give us a break and to let us have a visit with Katie where she would be the centre of attention. The aunt told Gracie that Jack was coming over but never heard back from Gracie, nor have we. Not once during this time did Gracie ask how Jack was. And so it goes.
This morning Jack was up at 4am, thanks time change. Before it was time to go to daycare, he started vomiting so the poor guy is doped up with gravol, laying on the couch. He's also got diarrhea. Yay.
Otherwise life is the same. It's cold. It's snowing. I'm trapped inside with a sick child. It's my thirties all over again:)
First let me say that I came home to the sweetest package imaginable. I knew exactly what it was before I'd gotten more than the tiniest glance at a corner. You are such a dear, sweet woman.
ReplyDeleteNow. I react to that sort of crazy in the same way. I'm the sort of person who does not want to ever get stopped by the police because what if I had, at one point, unknowingly stashed a kilo of cocaine in my dashboard? And to have that woman making accusations and threats that of course she cannot prove or carry out, would be hell for me. So I can imagine.
Poor Jack and poor you. I hope he feels better soon. I also hope you don't get it.
I'm glad you liked the package. Jack's feeling better now this afternoon, so whatever it was, it was short lived.
ReplyDeleteI cannot imagine what you deal with. I'm so sorry. I am happy that it was a short bout for Jack and hopefully you don't catch whatever he had.
ReplyDeleteI'm hoping I don't catch it either. My youngest was a great one for vomiting as well, every time she got sick there was a lot of vomiting.
DeleteI am sorry you feel trapped and I am so sorry you are being attacked by a crazy woman. Even though logic tells you her threats will amount to nothing, logic plays no part in the emotional reaction.
ReplyDeleteI have forgotten, does Gracie still have custody as per the courts or is that down to the guardians?
Gracie still has day to day parenting, which is custody I guess. We would have to go to court again to apply for day to day parenting. It was already turned down once.
DeleteGracie is batshit crazy. Is the social worker still on this case? Jack would not be safe with her.
ReplyDeleteNo, the social worker isn't involved anymore because he has four guardians and they assume that we will make sure that Jack stays safe. It's cheaper for the government this way.
DeleteJack should never ever live with Gracie again. Not even for an hour.
ReplyDeleteI agree.
DeleteGlad that Jack is better! That would make me sick to my stomach to have to deal with Gracie. I too have an overdeveloped guilt complex and am easily threatened and shamed because of it.
ReplyDeleteYeah, I feel shame to. My go to is always, it's my fault. Hard to let go of that.
DeleteIt is abundantly clear that Gracie is unfit to be a parent. Jack is not safe with her, period. Full stop.
ReplyDeleteShe is his mother though and has rights, until we can prove she is unsafe.
DeleteOy vey. This is such a near-impossible situation. Except for your love, of course, and care for that little boy. I know what it's like to feel like you're at fault even when you've done nothing wrong. It's terrible, and if you need reminding that you've done nothing wrong, we are here to back you up. We're at your back, as are so many people that love you.
ReplyDeleteThanks Elizabeth.
DeleteOh, the best laid plans, until children get sick. Commiserations.(I brought up 4 by myself). Memories!!
ReplyDeleteHi via Alison's blog...and I think I have seen your comments elsewhere too.🙂
Welcome and thank you. Sick kids are not the nicest little people:)
DeleteWhat Gracie should be saying is - "Thank you, thank you for loving my son and for being there when I could not cope, for giving him a peaceful, stable place to be. And thank you to The Big Guy for being a great role model to Jack and for loving him as much as you do. I will try to get myself together so that one day in the future I can bring him home and be a proper mother to him. I know that will be hard but I hope you will support me. I'm very sorry about the stuff I said about the police and your nursing licence. I really should not have said all that and I am really sorry."
ReplyDeleteThat would be lovely and about as likely as Boris doing the right thing.
DeleteAbusive alcoholic family members are the bane of most family's existence. Good for you for blocking her. If she can't control her demon, then she should be forced to go through the other guardians to give you a message. Considering her threats, I think that's fair. Then THEY'LL have to contend with the beast.
ReplyDeleteI feel bad for her mother and sister. I have put up with the crap for a year because of the death by suicide of their husband and father. I wanted to protect them I guess but I'm done with that.
DeleteAs harsh as it may seem, but Gracie is not a parent. Maybe she will learn to be one in the future but from what you tell us, she is pretending to want to be one. And that boy comes first.
ReplyDeleteOther people's nasty behaviour is NEVER your fault. NEVER. Remember that. You deserve only kindness and respect, as do we all. xoxo Kate
ReplyDelete