Thursday, July 19, 2018

I've been on estrogen and progesterone for the past five years because I kind of lost my mind when menopause first hit me five years ago.  But you're only supposed to stay on it for five years and my time is up so I've been decreasing the dose for the past few months until this past Monday when I took the last patch off.

So now the hot flashes are back in full force, enough to make me want to vomit last night.  We took the dog for a walk and it's hot as hell here.  When we got back home to our lovely hot house I sat down and had a hot flash which heated me up enough to feel sick.  It passed but it's a very unpleasant feeling.

I also feel foggy and maybe a little irritable, maybe a lot irritable.  I have a problem with my temper anyway which I try to keep in check but when my hormones are out of whack it feels like trying to rein in a dragon, a fiery, pissed off dragon.  So there's that.

Otherwise life is fine.  I need more exercise but keep finding excuses to not exercise when the best thing for me would be exercise.

I'm training a young nurse to work in our interventional radiology suite and found it difficult to focus yesterday.  She had lots of questions which I tried to answer while also assisting the radiologist.  Mistakes were made, by me.  Nothing to do with the patient, just with me not paying attention to what was going on because I was distracted.  I kept handing the rad the wrong instruments.  He's an extremely kind man and when I apologized to him later he said not to worry.  We're a team.  I'm helped him when he first started and today he was able to help me.

So I'm not losing my marbles but I am having a hard time dealing with distractions, something the big guy would agree with as we had a long conversation about this last night.  He's not wrong but it's hard to hear the truth.  Neither is this a new problem with me, I've been like this my whole life.

I'm off today so I'm taking the dog for a nice long walk before it gets too hot.

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