Some of my husband's shots of the Sockeye, my photos didn't really turn out very well, not of the fish anyway.

I happened to buy a couple of books before we left for our getaway and one of them was called "Margo's Got Money Troubles" by Rufi Thorpe.  I didn't know anything about it but I liked the first paragraph so I thought I'd give it a go.  I read it in a day and when I was done, I started rereading it.  It wouldn't be everyone's cup of tea, but I loved it.

The book is about a twenty year old woman, Margo, with a brand new baby who is fired from her job as a waitress because she can't find childcare.  In the US there is no year long paid maternity leave, which just boggles my mind.  US politicians want young women to have more babies but provide no supports for that to happen.  Don't have an abortion but we're not helping you either once the baby is born.  The height of hypocrisy in my mind.

Margo's mother is kind of a gold digger (sort of, but mostly a woman who puts looks and herself, before all else) and her father was a wrestler until he wrecked his back.  She decides to support herself and her son by appearing on OnlyFans.  It's a story about family, addictions, sex, hypocrisy, misogyny, shame, algorithms, and love. 

I was twenty-one when I had my son, way back in the eighties.  I refused to marry the father, even as a twenty-one year old I realized that would be a huge mistake, that was a problem for more than a few people in my life.  By the time my son was two weeks old I knew that I would be on my own raising him and would need a decent job.  I applied and was accepted into the nursing program.  I started nursing school when my son was four months old and we both survived the two year program.  My mum was amazing and took care of my son for me while I went to school, studied, and did my practicums.  I couldn't have done it without her.  I was very lucky but I worked hard too.

The character Margo is a smart, resilient, hard working young woman.  I admire her.  She's not real obviously and in real life she would have a lot more baggage to deal with, but it's nice to read a story about a smart, successful young woman.  She is judged relentlessly for making pornography but she stands up for herself and fights back.  The book makes us think about sex and sex workers in a different way.  One character makes the point that if a guy is looking at a naked woman and she doesn't know, she's not slutty, but if the woman offers an image of herself naked, if she is in control of the narrative, then she is considered slutty.  The double standard for men and women is alive and well sadly.

Last night we watched Law and Order: SVU.  It was about a drunk young woman who was raped by three men but the law in New York states says that if a woman willingly gets drunk, then it's more difficult to argue rape.  If a person voluntarily drank alcohol or took drugs, prosecutors face a high legal burden. Under existing statutes, they generally cannot claim the victim was "mentally incapacitated" solely from voluntary substance use.  As a young woman who voluntarily got drunk, I can assure you that I never wanted to be raped, nor have I ever met a woman who did.

I digress but you get my point.  Double standards still exist and are vigorously defended by courts, legislators, schools, and religions.  And men wonder why women are angry.