I've decided to try growing cats instead of pumpkins. Do I need to bury the cat deeper?
It was snowing here this morning. It's stopped now thankfully but the ground is good and slippery.
No dog walk this morning, baked cookies instead.
I go to a pottery class put on the county of Strathcona. They have asked us in the past what they can do to improve the class. All of us said that they can make the class three hours long. We want more clay time, not less. Right now we get fourteen classes, every Monday morning and every other Wednesday, excluding stat holidays. This is what we asked for.
After clay time, we go back to the old farmhouse and have tea together and chat about whatever we want to. It's a 55+ group and I suppose it's supposed to support seniors. Yesterday the young woman who runs the program joined us; she never has before.
We chatted a little and then she said that going forward, the program would only be running on Mondays, no reason given. She had a suggestion though, there are free programs offered by Gallery@510 every Wednesday morning where we can sign up and learn different crafts, not clay. She spoke at length about the different "fun" things we could learn. She even brought a catalogue with photos!
I stopped talking and left early. I felt like we had been treated like old ladies/children, who couldn't manage to do things for ourselves, women who needed her help to figure things out. We were a problem that she needed to solve. Why, I don't know, but I felt it. If the program needs to be cut, tell us why. We all pay for the program. It's not free.
We are a core group of six women who are have been going there for 2-3 years. Our ages range from 63-73. Some of the women are widows, some are still married. Between all of us we have raised seventeen children. We have navigated abusive partners, divorce, widowhood, raising children alone, and grief. We are not stupid. We are not children. All that we want is someplace to go and work with clay, while we learn about pottery, and support each other. It keeps us off the streets:)
I was angry yesterday when I got in my car to leave. I felt like I had been condescended to and I haven't felt that way in years. If seniors face this kind of treatment (and I'm guessing yes) on a regular basis, I can tell you that I am going to be one angry old(er) lady and there will be swearing.
We had a windstorm on the weekend which knocked out power and traffic lights in some areas. I haven't been out and about in a storm like that before and it was stressful. The winds hit up to 100 km/hr. What I didn't realize is that the same windstorm that swept through here, also hit Canadian Forces Base Wainwright where training with live ammunition was taking place.
Apparently there often grass fires at Wainwright because of the live ammunition, and there was a grass fire on Saturday but it was far enough away to not warrant any additional precautions, or shut down training. Except the wind shifted and hit 100 km/hr and in less than a minute, the training area was engulfed in flames. There seems to be some unanswered questions about explosions, but there was a massive fire for sure.
Four military personnel lost their lives and another 39 were injured, 19 are in critical condition. I have a hard time with stuff like this with fires, mass casualties, families forever changed, grief I suppose. The most horrible part was the wingnuts who thought it was a conspiracy coming two days before the referendum here. That somehow the Prime Minister was to blame. WTF!
I have no fucks left for whack jobs who blame everybody else for what's going wrong in their lives. The UCP likes to blame Ottawa and immigrants when it is in fact their mismanagement of resources and our province. They seem fine with fanning the flames of racism and do nothing to stop it because it serves their purpose. It's disgusting, but that is not a strong enough word for what I think. The UCP seems fine with burning this province to the ground to advance their own agenda.
I hope the referendum goes well today and the UCP and Danielle Smith are told in no uncertain terms to leave our province alone and shut the fuck up.
Some of my husband's shots of the Sockeye, my photos didn't really turn out very well, not of the fish anyway.
I happened to buy a couple of books before we left for our getaway and one of them was called "Margo's Got Money Troubles" by Rufi Thorpe. I didn't know anything about it but I liked the first paragraph so I thought I'd give it a go. I read it in a day and when I was done, I started rereading it. It wouldn't be everyone's cup of tea, but I loved it.
The book is about a twenty year old woman, Margo, with a brand new baby who is fired from her job as a waitress because she can't find childcare. In the US there is no year long paid maternity leave, which just boggles my mind. US politicians want young women to have more babies but provide no supports for that to happen. Don't have an abortion but we're not helping you either once the baby is born. The height of hypocrisy in my mind.
Margo's mother is kind of a gold digger (sort of, but mostly a woman who puts looks and herself, before all else) and her father was a wrestler until he wrecked his back. She decides to support herself and her son by appearing on OnlyFans. It's a story about family, addictions, sex, hypocrisy, misogyny, shame, algorithms, and love.
I was twenty-one when I had my son, way back in the eighties. I refused to marry the father, even as a twenty-one year old I realized that would be a huge mistake, that was a problem for more than a few people in my life. By the time my son was two weeks old I knew that I would be on my own raising him and would need a decent job. I applied and was accepted into the nursing program. I started nursing school when my son was four months old and we both survived the two year program. My mum was amazing and took care of my son for me while I went to school, studied, and did my practicums. I couldn't have done it without her. I was very lucky but I worked hard too.
The character Margo is a smart, resilient, hard working young woman. I admire her. She's not real obviously and in real life she would have a lot more baggage to deal with, but it's nice to read a story about a smart, successful young woman. She is judged relentlessly for making pornography but she stands up for herself and fights back. The book makes us think about sex and sex workers in a different way. One character makes the point that if a guy is looking at a naked woman and she doesn't know, she's not slutty, but if the woman offers an image of herself naked, if she is in control of the narrative, then she is considered slutty. The double standard for men and women is alive and well sadly.
Last night we watched Law and Order: SVU. It was about a drunk young woman who was raped by three men but the law in New York states says that if a woman willingly gets drunk, then it's more difficult to argue rape. If a person voluntarily drank alcohol or took drugs, prosecutors face a high legal burden. Under existing statutes, they generally cannot claim the victim was "mentally incapacitated" solely from voluntary substance use. As a young woman who voluntarily got drunk, I can assure you that I never wanted to be raped, nor have I ever met a woman who did.
I digress but you get my point. Double standards still exist and are vigorously defended by courts, legislators, schools, and religions. And men wonder why women are angry.
Jack is fine in fact this morning he told me that the filling was nothing. I said, it didn't even hurt did it? And he said no. Sigh. At least he wasn't traumatized.
We've started telling each other three good things that happened that day as we lay in bed at night. Jack's counselor suggested it and he's learning to look for the good things, even if they happen every day. I can't remember what he told me last night but he did want to up the ante and listed off five good things that happened yesterday. Sometimes I share my good things with him too but mostly it's about him. Last night one of my good things was me riding his electric scooter, which he thought was funny.
We're heading to Salmon Arm tomorrow for the long weekend. We're going to see the salmon run again at TsĂștswecw Park. Last year was lovely and this year is supposed to be even better. I'll try and post some photos while we're away.